Related to my last post, another way I’ve learned how to ask better questions is through Howard S. Becker’s Tricks of the Trade. This has probably been one of the most influential bits of writing I’ve ever run across
I first understood that “How?” was better than “Why?” as a result of doing field research. When I interviewed people, asking them why they did something inevitably provoked a defensive response. […] Even cooperative, nondefensive interviewees gave short answers to “Why?” hey understood the question to be asking for a cause, maybe even causes, but in any event for something that could be summarized briefly in a few words. And not just any old cause, but the cause contained in the victim’s intentions. If you did it, you did it for a reason. OK, what’s your reason? Furthermore, “Why?” required a “good” answer, one that made sense and could be defended.
At this point, it almost takes an active effort for me to ask a “why” question. I have learned so much more from conversations, and been able to talk about difficult subjects more easily, than I ever would have been if I hadn’t been fortunate enough to read Becker.
